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Toilet seat beat masturbation

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Massive group-text debate going on right now. Are you in bed, alone, just waking up or about to go to sleep? Are you in the bathroom at a family gathering or just lollygagging in the shower? Are you surfing the web for ribald content? For real: ever since the advent of the internet, all office chairs are now as suspect as hotel bedspreads. I fear them.

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